A yoni massage is a tantric vaginal massage with ancient origins. According to advanced certified tantra instructor Mare Simone, who learned about yoni massage from Charles Muir, known as the “godfather of tantra,” the name “yoni” originates from the ancient Sanskrit language. It refers to the sacred area from which life originates.
But a yoni massage covers more than just the vagina. A yoni massage is “a full body tantric massage that includes the buttocks, breasts, vulva, and vagina,” according to Rosie Rees, a sexuality coach and the founder of Yoni Pleasure Palace, an online retailer offering wellness products like the glass pleasure wand called The Cervix Serpent, which can be used in a self-led yoni massage. Of course, the recipient must consent at every stage.
While an orgasm may result from a yoni massage, that is not the intended outcome. The fundamental objective of a yoni massage, according to Simone, is to promote healing and pleasure. More than anything else, it is intended to be a profoundly transformative event. (But who will object if the Big O does occur?)
According to Simone, releasing tension and emotions that women frequently carry in their pelvic regions without realising it is another significant advantage of yoni massages. Also, it doesn’t always result from violent sexual trauma; sometimes it’s just the reality that sex is still stigmatised or shamed in many cultures.
Yoni massages, according to Rees, also educate you how to completely receive. One of the most effective components of a yoni massage, according to her, is learning to be receptive to receiving. “The capacity to heal multiple layers of sexual trauma is the art of submitting and receiving caring touch without expecting to have an orgasm, perform, or provide anything in return.”
You can perform a yoni massage on yourself, your lover, or even a trained expert like Simone. However, professionals give the lowdown on how to massage your own nether region for the purposes of this essay. Simply consider it to be a form of attentive masturbation.
How to perform a yoni massage on oneself
Establish a mood
Simone advises establishing the ambiance with some mood lighting and even taking a bath before you get your yoni massage on. And don’t be afraid to make it special—if that’s your thing, you might, for example, drop some flower petals in the bath or on the bed.
Clearly define what you want to get out of the encounter.
Simone advises beginning your massage by establishing an aim that is more expansive than simply having an orgasm. Opening your heart or finding a partner are two examples. These objectives, according to her, “create a deeper pool for possible enjoyment.” “At that point, it starts to concern something more abstract. When it happens, the experience actually transforms into a cosmic, wonderful one. the sort that makes you feel emancipated and transformed.
Begin with silence.
Spend some time being motionless and in-tune with your body before starting your work. Simone recommends a mudra, which is a hand pose that creates energy. By connecting your thumb and fingers together, you can make the mudra by forming the shape of a heart with your hands. Place the heart-shaped mudra over your vulva so that your fingers and thumbs are in contact with the clitoris’ shaft and base, respectively. Then, she advises, just breathe into that area and allow whatever arises to occur without judgement. You can also use this time, she advises, to speak briefly with your yoni and find out its needs and general wellbeing. (It won’t care if you giggle as you do this, I swear.)
You can even incorporate some movement into the mudra if the mood strikes. Simone advises that a fantastic method to warm up for a yoni massage is to dance and move your hips in circles. “It increases power, increases blood flow to that area, and makes it incredibly simple to engorge.”
When you’re ready, you may begin the massaging activity. Feel free to go a little further than you normally would when having sex by yourself. The entire vulva needs to be massaged and palpated, according to Simone. Additionally, this is the ideal time to use some lubricant. Simone prefers to keep things natural by using some good old multipurpose coconut oil, despite the fact that there are many clean lube options available today. It’s a great moment to be alive.
During a yoni massage, numerous tantric techniques are applied. One of them is penetration. Simone advises beginning with one finger, preferably from your non-dominant hand. (It is gentler.) Put your second hand over the clitoris after that. Both the interior and the outer are connected when they come into contact. Then, you can tap your finger on the vaginal canal’s upper wall to stimulate that region. After that, begin making circular and side-to-side strokes.
Take note of your bodily
Moving slowly is the most crucial thing to keep in mind throughout the procedure. Be curious and pay attention to your yoni with the only intention of being in the moment and showing respect for them, advises Simone.
Look for any tenseness, discomfort, or numbness. If you do, hold it there while breathing into it to help whatever is there be released. Any number of feelings, including fear, rage, grief, or memories, may surface. Simone advises accepting everything and allowing it to surface. Making any necessary noises is also strongly advised.
If you become elated, pause.
Simone urges you to take a breather just before the happy ending, even though it could be challenging. Feel the excitement escalating and spread some of that vigor around, she advises, because that will make the orgasm more intense and satisfying. “If you’re just hurrying to the climax, the peak can come extremely quickly. Orgasm, on the other hand, develops into large, enduring waves if you slow down and really train yourself to experience arousal like ocean ripples radiating throughout the body. Noted.
Savour the aftermath
After your yoni massage is finished, Simone advises you to take some time to relax and enjoy it. She advises using one hand to cup your yoni and the other to place pressure on a part of your body where you want to direct that energy.
You can then relax by doing some yoga or meditation. Another really effective post-yoni ritual is journaling. The subtle nuances of being in such a deep, connected place may be lost if you don’t somehow capture everything that happens during a yoni massage, according to Simone. How did you find the experience? What emotions, pictures, or memories surfaced? Write it all down, and feel free to repeat it all the next day.
Additional yoni massage methods
The only restriction on yoni massage techniques, in the opinion of embodiment coach and yoni massage therapist Laura Elizabeth, is your own creativity. In other words, pay attention to your body and act in a way that makes you feel good. Having said that, here are three additional ways to try in case you need some extra motivation.
Inhale and touch
Elizabeth advises just placing one or both of your hands over the yoni and concentrating on deep breathing to build a connection if you’re new to yoni massage and want to dip your toes (or, hands) into the technique.
Apply copious amounts of lubrication over the vulva and sweep your entire palm downward to stimulate and bring blood flow to the vulva, advises Elizabeth, to awaken the yoni.
Jerk and tug
Increase the intensity of your yoni massage by using the clitoris. Elizabeth gives the instructions to begin by massaging each side of the cliteral hood and slipping a finger inside the outer labia. According to her, the sensation can be made more intense by gently pushing and pulling on the clitoral hood.
There are three advantages of yoni massage.
Enlightens you on your favourite anatomy
Education is one of the advantages of a yoni massage. The clitoris is a component of the vagina that most vagina owners are familiar with, but Simone claims that many erogenous zones are concealed. It can be rather eye-opening to learn how to connect more with what’s inside the vaginal canal—hello, G spot!
A yoni massage, also known as a yoni mapping session, may teach you a lot about each pleasure zone in your body and how it reacts to stimulation and touch, continues Elizabeth.
Helps overcome embarrassment
Openly discussing self-pleasure and sexuality isn’t always the norm, even though it’s frequently easier to do so over other wellness-related topics like your favourite matcha latte. Yoni massages can facilitate discussion starters. According to Elizabeth, yoni massage can be an excellent technique for letting go of shame related to one’s body image, enjoyment, and sexuality. It is incredibly cathartic and healing to be seen in your vulnerability and given freedom to enjoy yourself.
Reinforces your bodily connection
Yoni massages can foster a closer bond with our bodies in a society where we frequently live in our brains. According to Elizabeth, yoni massages can assist in bringing you into a really grounded and embodied space to truly tune into your own needs and those of your yoni. During a yoni massage, you literally feel yourself while also stimulating and increasing blood flow to the area, which is frequently numb or painful. The muscles inside and around the vagina are relaxed by a yoni massage, making it simpler to enjoy sexual pleasure.
Overall, yoni massages are an excellent (and seductive!) approach to strengthen your bond with your body and your yoni and to generally feel more in control. According to Elizabeth, becoming aware of what arouses desire is a great instrument for transformation. She says that benefits include improved orgasms, general well-being, vigour, more energy, a positive body image, and the release of accumulated tension. It makes sense that the practise is growing in acceptance so swiftly.